Tuesday, March 19, 2013


I made a HUGE decision tonight. As of now, please just pray it's the right one.

Keep praying.

Tuesday, March 12, 2013

My Dad Told Me to Kill Myself

So, I tried it. I obviously (and thankfully) failed, but it forced me to have to spend the weekend in Georgia Regional's mental hospital. What an eye opener! I met a lot of women just like me...and a lot of women much crazier than me. But I left with a sense of who I am, who I can be, and I think that I might have made some lives a little better. Please never cease praying for me. Bipolar disorder is a complicated monster, and it may take a while to figure out now to balance my unstable brain. Special thanks to Helen, Mama, Aunt Marilyn, and Aunt Donnie, whose visits and phone calls kept me (mostly) sane. I love each and every person who is reading this!

Tuesday, March 5, 2013

So, I had a nervous breakdown

And I'm not ashamed to say it. I take on a lot. I am strong enough to take on a lot. But I am fragile. I break. And this weekend, I shattered. I have been diagnosed with Bipolar Disorder and Intermittent Explosive Disorder. You can call me crazy and treat me different if it makes you feel better, but I have a disease; it doesn't have me. I have come to realize that none of this is my fault. Or your fault. Or hers or his. I have a sick, unstable brain. I was born this way. But it will no longer control me, defeat me, and make me feel stupid.

I just need y'all to love me through it.

Keep praying.

Beautiful Mess

Watch "Diamond Rio - Beautiful Mess (lyrics)" on YouTube

Saturday, March 2, 2013

I'm a Disappointment

And nothing more.

Keep praying. I need it. I feel like a failure lately, though amazing things abound.